Kindness: '13 Reasons Why'
by Ashley Mondale, English Teacher
“Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.” – Philo
Kindness. It’s a simply philosophy. It’s something you learn in the very early stage of development. From the time we are able to make actual words come out of our mouths, we are taught to say “please” and “thank you.” And yet, how can it be that that we have forgotten this simple thing, this earliest of lessons, this ideal?
There are times when I walk through the halls of our school and I wonder how we have let kindness fall by the wayside. Is it really that hard to say “thank you” or “you’re welcome” to someone else? If you dropped your books in the hall or the stairwell, wouldn’t you want someone to help you pick them up? I can’t imagine why you wouldn’t, so how can you just walk by when it happens to someone else?
But I find myself forgetting kindness, too. I spent a weekend thinking about my actions and what I found truly surprised me. I examined myself only to find that I am often more polite and kind to people I don’t know. At Giant Eagle I said “excuse me” as I passed someone in the aisle and I told the cashier to have a great day. But at home, I seemed to be giving orders instead of asking for something. Why is that? Is it because I no longer care what my family thinks or that I don’t need to be kind to them 24/7 since we are family? Do I really care more about how some stranger in the cereal aisle perceives me than I do my own sister? I am ashamed of myself.
As we sit each week in our class meetings, our goal is to eliminate bullying in our school. But how many of you are taking the lessons to heart? Are you thinking about your actions that week or are you more worried about the test you have later in the day? Did you ever really take the time to think, really and seriously think, about how your actions – whether it be your kindness or lack thereof – affect the people around you?
The students of Crestmont High School never did. They were typical teenagers, typical people, who went about their lives without a care about those around them. They never considered the battles being fought by their classmates. At least that was how it was until Hannah Baker killed herself. And then the entire school was rocked by Hannah’s story and the 13 reasons why she did it.
This story, Hannah’s story, is written by first-time author Jay Asher in his fabulous novel “13 Reasons Why.” You see, Hannah was fighting her own battles every day, but those around her failed to notice, or maybe they failed to care. And before Hannah died, she decided to explain the reasons behind her suicide by making audio cassette tapes dedicated to each of her “13 reasons.” Hannah stuffed the 7 tapes in a box and mailed the box to the first person on her list. The box was then mailed to each person mentioned on the tapes explaining the role he or she played in Hannah’s death.
When Clay Jensen, the novel’s narrator, gets the box, he is physically sickened by Hannah’s stories. He liked her but was always too nervous to really make a move. As he listens to each tape, he becomes disgusted with how people treated Hannah, and he worries about what he did to make Hannah want to kill herself.
As a reader, you get sucked in to Hannah’s story. Through Hannah’s voice, you learn of her heartbreak, embarrassment, loneliness and disappointment. And you hate her – you hate her for being selfish by taking her life, for involving Clay whose only faults were being shy and a decent guy, and for letting the petty aspects of high school drama eat at her until there was nothing left. But somewhere within your hate for her, you feel shame too. And it’s okay to be ashamed because we have all done things to others we shouldn’t be proud of, and there is shame in that.
Yet underneath the hate and the shame is the lesson that we need to take from this novel – Your actions, regardless of how big or small you think they are, are affecting someone, somewhere, somehow. Hannah Baker had her 13 reasons why she killed herself, but you should take away from her story 13 reasons to be a better person.
When I look out at the faces of those of you who sit in my class or pass by in the hall I often think of the battles you fight every day. I don’t know all of your stories and you certainly don’t know mine, but I know the courage it takes for many of you to come to school each day. I know that after the long hours you spend here you often spend even longer hours working, taking care of family, or heaven only knows what else. So to you I can only say this: Think about those around you. Each and every one of us is fighting battles and we all deserve kindness. Every day. Period.
[comments]
|
