Gentleman and Ladies, start your engines - or not 
by Dan Rzewnicki, Editor in Chief
October 14 , 2011
Blublublublub, then some sort of sound that resembles an elephant fart, and finally eeeeeeeeekkkkk!
Yeah, that's pretty much what my car sounds like just about every time I start it and pull out of the driveway – on a good day. Needless to say, the car sounds much better when the radio is turned up to an eardrum-shattering volume.
My little Hyundai is a very reliable car. It’s great on gas and gets me from point A to B. However, it is rather “seasoned” and is beginning to have some complications in its old age. My old car really grinds my gears.
My Hyundai isn't really that old, but I think its unhealthy relationship with its previous owner stripped a few precious years from its life. For instance, she put touring tires on the car and couldn't figure out why it wouldn't go anywhere in the snow. Furthermore, she had a very bad habit of never getting anything replaced.
Recently, I have encountered some problems with my car, and none of them have been pretty.
First, every time I turn the wheel, my car emits an awful noise that sounds similar to a toddler squealing through a broken whistle. The perks of this sound, however, are that far more people seem to be eager to help me park, although many just jump into their cars and drive away in fear of going permanently deaf and/or killing a small child in a rush of anger.
Second, my exhaust leaks. My car now sounds like a v8 engine gone bad or as if someone in the back seat should have taken some Beano before entering in the car. Additionally, broken parts mean getting the car repaired.
The first part of fixing the car means taking it to a mechanic. After scheduling my appointment, I arrived exactly on time, yet the mechanic informed me that there would be no openings for another half hour even though I had reserved a timeslot. He then asked if I would like to just drop off the car and pick it up later. Didn’t he see I was alone? Didn’t he wonder how I could leave without my car if I just dropped it off?
And so the wait began. The only good part of waiting in the customer lounge was that there were no flyers similar to the ones at the doctor's office that have me entering the appointment inquiring if I have lupus and leaving with a box of Rogaine and an appointment for reconstructive plastic surgery.
Finally after more than a half hour, my car took its turn on the rack. After short less-than-thorough inspection, the mechanic informed me that I needed some sort of part that goes on the bottom of the car and the whole job would cost about $550. My dad informed me that we could buy the part for $250 and do it ourselves. So, for all of you playing Clue in the near future, it was the angry father with the wrench on the driveway.
I am very pleased that I “own” my car and also very happy that the only thing I have had to pay for at this point is gas and air freshener. Furthermore, my car is nice enough that I actually like it, yet dumpy enough that I will appreciate a good car when I buy one for myself in the future.
But maybe most importantly, my car has taught me several lessons:
- Leather seats are bad in the winter – and worse in the summer.
- The best way to fix anything in a car is to turn up the volume on the radio.
- The smaller the car, the fewer annoying passengers can ride in it.
- Large trunks can be helpful.
- Mechanics are con artists.
All in all, I have come to enjoy my little Hyundai. It satisfies my need for transportation freedom. However, just like anything else in the world, when it doesn't work, it really grinds my gears.
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